Tag Archives: Dentist

Hungry, Hungry Hippo

15 Jan

I just came back from the dentist, and I’m starving. Not like, actually-actually starving (yes, I know that’s a thing, and if you’re reading this blog and about to say something about actually-actually starving, man, you are in the wrong place. Go on a news website or something).

Anyway, I’m super hungry. I didn’t have breakfast this morning, because I usually eat breakfast when I get into work, but I didn’t go to work, I went to the dentist, man! And now my mouth is numb and I have to wait, because I have stew for lunch, and it will just dribble impressively out the side of my mouth like I’m that 80-year-old drug dealer in a wheelchair with a bell on Breaking Bad.

I recently watched the Seinfeld episode where Elaine has to fast for three days for an ultrasound. Three days! I can’t even comprehend that. I wouldn’t be able to sleep, or shower (I get real nauseous in the shower sometimes, that’s totally normal, right?), or do anything. I would just be way to hungry all the time.

The point of this blog being, can someone please bring my a pizza bun that I can respectably eat. Thanks.

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